![]() After following events set during the times of Charles II’s reign, with the main characters being Charles, his brother James, and James’s daughters Mary and Anne. Every “had” in the above quote could’ve been cut or replaced.Ī similar thing happens around one-third of the way into the story. It’s also a filler word, as the narrative is in the past tense. That’s the problem with using the past perfect “had” – it reports on the scene as opposed to taking the reader into the action as it unfolds. ![]() ![]() ![]() The above *reports* on what happens, rather than *dramatizing* the events. So distressed had she been that her attendants had feared for her life and in her despair she had begged the Bishop of Winchester to come to her, and before him and the Duchess of Ormonde she had taken a solemn vow swearing that Berkeley had never been her lover and that the father of her child was James, Duke of York.” “How she had hated the lying Berkeley! He had desired her and because she had refused his attentions, this was his revenge. ![]() The overuse of “had” (past perfect) in the opening chapter makes it a passive start: It uses backstory early on, which would’ve been better filtered in later through dialogue to make it more active, or cut out altogether, as it isn’t essential. Sadly, it’s one of those novels that’s so dry it makes you thirsty. “The Three Crowns” covers a period of England’s history that I’m not too familiar with, so I looked forward to this one. ![]()
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |